Sunday, December 21, 2008

a season of optimism

So its Sunday and I have school tommorrow but for once I am glad. I just want to get it out of the way so it can be winter break already!!! I went to a Christmas party yesterday at one of my childhood friend's house. It's been a long time since I had been to her house! It reminded me of when we were little and had sleepovers at her house all the time. It was a nice feeling. Santa even drove through her neighborhood on a firetruck and I screamed "I WANT EDWARD CULLEN FOR CHRISTMAS!!!" (Yeah, I'm one of those kids thats in love with twilight XD) I love this time of year. I feel so optimistic all the time during the holidays which is really kool. I don't think my mom has really done any Christmas shopping yet which kind of bothers me but oh well. Its about giving, not recieving. But I'm really bad at picking out gifts so I tend not to buy my friends gifts so it makes me feel bad when they give me a gift and I give them nothing. I bet most people don't care and just want presents. But whatever. I also like New Years. I get to stay up pretty late and then I feel like I can start over new and set new goals for myself. I dunno. I feel fresh or something. Also I like some changes but I'm not so good with some other changes. Like when I was younger my family had more traditions and stuff we'd do for the holidays like going to see these winter lights around Christmas, or trick-or-treating with my cousins in my grandmothers neighborhood,or dying Easter egg at my grandmothers house with my cousins, or seeing the fire works with my cousins. But those traditions seem to be dying. I know last year it really freaked me out. This past Easter really freaked me out too cuz we didn't dye Easter eggs at all and we didn't do brunch at my grandmothers or dinner at my aunts house like we do every other year. It was just like a normal day but I had a basket with candy in it. So I got depressed and started worrying that holidays don't really mean anything when you're older. But I feel ok now that its the Christmas season because hopefully there will always be something under the tree and at New Years the big ball always drops and a new year always begins. Its hard not to feel optimistic like a little kid again during the winter holidays season.
:D